Male Sci-Fi Fan Upset About Black Woman ‘Doctor Who’ Still Thinks Jesus Was White

BOSTON, MA – Shortly after Sunday’s historic episode of Doctor Who, which featured the first black woman to play ‘The Doctor’, 42-year-old sci-fi fan Marvin Duncan took to Facebook to express his outrage about the casting decision, despite simultaneously believing that Jesus Christ was a white man. “I don’t understand how a TV show about a shape-shifting time traveling Time Lord could possibly cast a black woman to play The Doctor. It doesn’t make any sense,” said Duncan, who, as a devout evangelical Christian, is also wholeheartedly convinced that a man from the Middle East was somehow white. “Honestly, I feel like the producers just wanted to change Doctor Who’s appearance to appeal to a new target audience. Talk about pandering,” he added, just minutes after praying beside the portrait of a pale, straight-haired, blue-eyed Jesus hanging above his fireplace mantle. At press time, Duncan had shifted gears to explaining why families in Central America fleeing violence shouldn’t be granted asylum, despite believing in the teachings of a man whose family had to flee from violence.

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